Here We Are

When are you going to call me? I thought about it every single day --- now and then whenever my mind wonder around the memory game. I called you so many times --- but I guess your mind is buried in the load of daily life. I cannot blame you. I would have been too.

I am going to wear my light pink dress tomorrow. I took it out of my closet and laid it carefully on the end of the bed. There is my reflection in the mirror. I am not a thin stick of needle anymore --- over a decade, I cannot even loose an ounce on any firm will power. I do not have those long hairs that I love so much anymore --- I might be practically bald in a few year, the thought of which gives me a familiar smile. Nonetheless, I am still me --- as the way I am --- never bowing, never compromising, never forgetting --- annoying everyone including you with this tiresome overconfidence. But if one can see me deep down inside, oh!! --- how I hated those thorns that kept me in solitude all my life.

If I ever get a chance to write down the poems of our young and ambitious days or if I ever get a chance to play my hollow guitar again and sing my favorite songs in a whisper under the brightness of the moon or if I ever get a chance to draw the paintings of our Oh nothing so special memory lanes --- I will write about you, --- not only just who you are but also all the sadness and happiness about you. Will you let me be??? image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://idontlikemondays.us/blog/Bubas-Pink-Dress-Cherry-Blossom-Landscape-Photo.jpg

Winter Storm

Cherry Blossoms were very beautiful just a week or two ago. Pink blossoms were shinning brightly against the bright blue sky in a nice cold breeze. It was just a week ago. Now that cherry blossoms are lying on the green grass drenched in the soaked rain. The sky is dark gray --- rain clouds seems almost coming down on the earth, and embracing the top of the mountain. The storm has arrived. It might even snow in two days. The temperature is record low since 1976. One can hear the heavy rain spluttering over the window pane. The sound of the rain falling through the gutter could be a constant faint background music of the time being. While reading a sad book, drinking over a cup of coffee, and thinking over the fact that the combination will not be able to let one sleep effortlessly. The sky is crying. The earth is embracing the painful tears. Cherry blossom petals are lying helplessly. The rain will eventually wash away the dust. Tears will carry away the burden of pain. And when the storm is over, when the sun comes out --- everything will be looking afresh new --- just like a new born baby. And when the sadness is over, when the tears dried over --- happiness will be boundless laughing amusingly --- just like innocently being in love for the very first time.

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://martian.org/karen/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/cherry_snow.jpg

Hurtful

Love
to carry to the shore;
to bring down the stars;
suppose to be unconditional;
but,
Why?
It is hurtful.

Care
to stretch beyond the horizon;
to hold onto the end;
suppose to be kind and gentle;
but,
Why?
It is casual.

Truthful
to compare against the standard of gold;
to hold the inner wisdom;
suppose to glow honesty;
but,
Why?
It is a mirage.

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://heartsunbroken.files.wordpress.com/2009/11/pain-1-main_full.jpg

Without Any Answer

Days passing by

Unknowingly;
Where I am heading ---

Nights passing by
Sleeplessly;
Why I cannot letting you go ---

Life passing by
Unforgettably;
How our lives have been unfolding ---

Like a flower, intricate yet so simple.
Like a river, flowing yet never ending.
Like a star, --- so near yet so far.

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://databazaar.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8341c9a0e53ef010535f962e0970b-800wi&imgrefurl=http://blog.databazaar.com/printales/

I Dream of You

In the land of hazy dreams, --- I dream of you for the first time. It was vivid, it was so clear, it was as crispy as a fresh rice cake. Even having conversations calmly across the big dinning table, you are beaming with a big smile. I am happy to feel your joy. I saw you draw a picture for a display room --- it was undone --- it looks so darkly themed. I criticized on how dark the presentation is and talking aimlessly on how you should lighten up the theme. Then, again I was in the dinning room looking at the indoor fish pond pod puzzling why I am here. I saw your phone bill on the table $300 on your account --- and I was wondering why it is such an expensive bill. Your love one came and told me about the things that are told about me --- I was speechless. I wish I could evaporate right there --- and wonder again why I am here like this. Your home is painted in green mostly -- I would just paint off white instead of green. I went to the restroom to freshen up and saw the drawing room on the way. I saw a new drawing on the table. It is changed now as I have suggested. Somehow, I had a feeling of satisfaction --- accomplishment ---may be I was there for that purpose. I drew a Jasmine flower very recklessly on an empty paper and I left --- just like that --- without any goodbyes.

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0iIWSSVf8uHYfgESe7gC1tWNWxaEjXBV0s5gPQt4WuxHA8PEGYd08KBYue-EVpet305YsK9r85lY3lxRvSZ9j4UwscmjfEcL04Nr7z6MkEXh6I2zUrsB03vMthFcV0WIt8LBj/s1600/JasmineFlower1SQt.jpg

Happy New Year

After such a long time ---
yes --- happy new year ----
And yes, there are so many reasons for being away ---
being caught up in social tangles of web ---
regardless ----
Wishing for a very Happy New Year!
and for all the best to come ---

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://tribwekchron.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/fireworks.jpg

Story of Love

Looking away
while holding you close to my heart;
under the vast sky;
in the land of memories.

Blinking away
while laughing with tears in my eyes;
surrender the emotions;
in the land of fantasy.

Smiling away
while dying with pain in my soul;
glowing with love;
to the land of eternity.

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://images.shopping.indiatimes.com/images/product/102522_I-Too-Had-A-Love-Story_pbilimage1.jpg

Success

Different people measure success by different means. Is end justify the mean? The most important recipe in achieving success is being smart, having a good strategy, and persistence. Even though it is written in this order as how most people would think in the order of importance; amusingly, the backward order is the one that really determine the outcome. Persistence is the most important thing to achieve something that one desire --- as funny as it sounds, one has to know how to handle the persistence in achieving the success. Persistence is not just by sticking to one goal --- one has to be able to have enough courage to let go of the goals that has become unreasonable in their lives. A lot of people,through persistence, got what they pursuit but they are miserable. Why? Because they did not know how to compensate along their way of persistence. They were not very smart about their decisions, or their strategy had flaws or simply the strategy fails due to natural forces of every changing life process. One has to search their soul deep down, dug your own fears and face them --- and that alone can bring one to a true personal success. In the end, conquering yourself is the hardest thing to do and it is a door way to a satisfying success.

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://therealtimscott.com/images/

Total Lunar Eclipse

There is a winter storm
and it has been very cloudy ---
will we be able to observe the eclipse;
after midnight?
The chances are low.
No matter what ---
just keep the hopes up.

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://ilovewerewolves.com

Passing

Nights
Stand alone;
In the flicker of a candle.

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://lifetoolkit.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/CandleBook-300x225.jpg

Remembrance

The Remembrance Day.

Mother and Son

So touchy and so happy that we can even almost forget about all the evilness of the schemers. Mission accomplished for them, however, we don't care. Everyone is pretty happy to be able to "just see" the faces that they love the most.

This picture shows the mother and son, their moment of happiness, and the sacrifice they have made --- and most of all --- signature of what they had been fighting for --- the remembrance of the lost lives --- the spirit of the fighting peacocks.

The statement really stands out --- as pictures can tell a thousand words. How wonderful their happiness can bring joyous moment in lives of the people they love. Love is like a mirror --- how well their love has reflected upon the lost souls of the darkness?

Their clutching hands --- represents the power and love, a very strong bond and the support system. That can encourage the heart of despair lives.

Their contentment and their eyes without any greed or anger --- without any regret or hidden agenda. It is just simple and pure.

The hand holding on the arm of the son represents the people combination of all without any specific face. It shows how much people welcome the son as a family member and describe their affection for him with a sense of wanting to protect him as a family.

The man in the back of the mother represents the respect of the people towards the mother who has been giving everything she has for the people her father gave his life for.

The man in the back of the son with the video camera shows the importance of the mother and the son. It is an event that people wants to capture in their heart forever ---

Only You

Only you;
No one else.
Loyalty in check.

What I want to Read

--- is "I Remember Nothing" by Nora Ephron

Quote ---

"The O Word
I'm old.
I am sixty-nine years old.
I'm not really old, of course.
Really old is eighty.
But if you are young, you would definitely think that I'm old.
No one actually likes to admit that they're old.
The most they will cop to is that they're older. Or oldish.
In these days of physical fitness, hair dye, and plastic surgery, you can live much of your life without feeling or even looking old.
But then one day, your knee goes, or your shoulder, or your back, or your hip. Your hot flashes come to an end; things droop. Spots appear. Your cleavage looks like a peach pit. If your elbows faced forward, you would kill yourself. You're two inches shorter than you used to be. You're ten pounds fatter and you cannot lose a pound of it to save your soul. Your hands don't work as well as they once did and you can't open bottles, jars, wrappers, and especially those gadgets that are encased tightly in what seems to be molded Mylar. If you were stranded on a desert island and your food were sealed in plastic packaging, you would starve to death. You take so many pills in the morning you don't have room for breakfast.
Once a month there's a funeral. You lose close friends and discover one of the worst truths of old age; They're irreplaceable. People who run four miles a day and eat only nuts and berries drop dead. People who drink a quart of whiskey and smoke two packs of cigarettes a day drop dead. You are suddenly in a lottery, the ultimate game of chance, and someday your luck will run out. Everybody dies. There's nothing you can do about it.
Whether or not you eat six almonds a day. Whether or not you believe in God.
At some point I will be not just old, older, or oldish _ I will be really old. I will be actively impaired by age: something will make it impossible for me to read, or speak, or hear what's being said, or eat what I want, or walk around the block. My memory, which I can still make jokes about, will be so dim that I will have to pretend I know what's going on.
The realization that I may have only a few good years remaining has hit me with real force, and I have done a lot of thinking as a result. I would like to have come up with something profound, but I haven't. I try to figure out what I really want to do every day, I try to say to myself, "If this is one of the last days of my life, a I doing exactly what I want to be doing?"


----end of the quote.
I want to read "I remember nothing." because I don't want to remember a lot of things.

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.bookstore.washington.edu/_common/images/content/events/november/0307595609.gif

Captivated

I would have flown
All the way to the horizon aimlessly;
but why ---
did I hesitate?

I would have swum
Across the ocean tirelessly;
but why ---
did I turn around?

I would have pulled out
And cut off my own heart foolishly;
but why ---
it was so painful?

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://melonz.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/you-keep-me-captivated-necklace.jpg

Flash Back

Grey clouds;
Driving by the road drain with the rain,
Gaining conscious to loose again to the memories;
Of those sweet old days.

Humming;
Along the song from the radio,
Draining with the flow of happiness;
Of inner peace of soul.

Smiling;
Shinning with the vivid flood of emotions,
With you again as you had hold my hands;
Of the rainy days.

image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://xpgo.net/home/attachment/201003/24/11_1269423523LIbP.jpg

Today's Quote

Forbid the forbidden.

the image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.fotosearch.com/bthumb/CSP/CSP108/k1080277.jpg

End of the Rainbow

Chasing to the end;
Letting go of the emotions yet,
Not for the pot of gold.

image is from http://thefuntimesguide.com/2009/01/rainbow_roses.php

Solar Capture

I do not know why I have been watching the sun with more attention these days. It seems brighter like I have never noticed before. It seems much bigger before the sunsets too. Are there solar storms ---- eruptions on the sun lately? Is something changes in our layers of atmosphere? It just made me feel strange every time I am looking up at the sun. I have no idea why I am looking up at the sun so blindly more often than I used to. It just makes me feel strange --- not just once --- not just right now --- it's been a few month. I just felt that it seems more and more brighter and bigger. The color of the sun is different too --- it used to be on the yellow red orange hue --- but now it is just like a thousand watt light bulb and makes me feel like a tiny bug which just cannot look away from this strange attraction although it is blinding me. Why is the sun looks closer? I feel very silly --- yet I cannot help being anxious.

the image is from http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b3/Sun_pillar_forms_as_the_sun_rises_over_the_Arctic_plain_-_NOAA.jpg

Sun, Moon, and Star

You are all that.
Essential to life;
To guide our way.

Wishing for your health and happiness.